I registered for a counselling two weeks ago when I felt devastated and yesterday, I was questioning myself whether I really needed it and how the process would be. But after talking to the person, I felt much better. He validated the stages I felt during the grieving process and he also asked me to be more reflective to my grieving process since I tended to approach the grieving methodically instead of giving my heart the time to heal. One of the simulations that we did yesterday was to imagine what happened if the person stand in front of me, what would I say to him. He described my condition as having a false reassurance, which has the same affect as betrayal. Shadowing the truth with an imagination, which led to my devastation.
I also asked him the best way to move forward. I explained the no contact approach I did in the early stage of my breakup, which led to explosion on the second week. And while all the YouTube videos suggested that approach, it may also suppress your emotion and make your healing process become longer. I told him that it's exactly what happened to me. At the end, getting a cold shoulder from the Knight helped to move forward. His reaction towards me has totally changed and it gave me a new reality check that what we had has passed as well.
Currently, I am off from all the apps. Somehow, the apps gave me a toxic vibe.
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